The ANALyst

Leverage, optimise, synergise

Venus Strikes II


A month ago, I posted about the biggest problem confronting me at the time. Well here’s an update on the same. Having not found a single useful powerpoint deck that I could use to woo the “exotic girl in foriegn land”, I decided to take ResIpsa’s advice of “Just Do It”.

“Just Do It” however does not equate to “Just Tell Her”. That would be so “unconsultant-like” . It had to be done in style, with flair, passion and enthusiasm, highlighting my core attributes and negating the rumors (so often true) spread about me by lesser mortals. The consultant had to be proposed on another project!

First, the scene had to be set. The exotic girl in foreign land had to be given a few hints. BTW, by this point we had graduated from Facebook chats to “real” conversations on Skype (thank you messrs Facebook and Skype). The perfect opportunity came during a casual conversation, which went something like this,

Me: Did you finally manage to submit that ******* corporate comms assignment?

EGIFL: Yeah, just about…had to sit up all night for it…but yeah I got it done.

Me (sounding impressed): Not bad…you deserve a chocolate!

EGIFL: yeah sure…send me some…I mean now….can you do that…c’mon send something through that silly computer screen

This is where the powers of Google, the cellphone and my credit card combine to eliminate all challenges posed by the 7904.7 kilometers of sea and earth separating me and the exotic girl.

Step 1: Open internet browser (if not already open)

Step 2: Google “Chocolate delivery in *********”

Step 3: Acquire phone number for maker of gourmet chocolates.

Step 4: Dial above number

Step 5: Make small talk with the lady picking the phone (if a guy picks the phone, hang up and repeat steps 2 to 5)

Step 6: Order chocolate, reveal credit card number

Step 7: Watch horrified look on exotic girl’s face as she watches all this happening live through Skype.

Step 8: Scene is set.

Having set the scene pretty well with actions like the above, it was time to take the next step. Now that was going to be a real challenge. While I would have preferred the Eiffel tower or Walt Disney World, the realist in me decided that they were probably a bit “out-of-scope”. Now I had been told in no uncertain terms that the telephone and IM were not acceptable means of taking the next step, irrespective of the distance. That left me with the only option of having to travel to the Old World. My commitments (aka projects) in the Emerging Economy, however, would not afford me such an opportunity until early next year. And three months is a long time to wait.

I had to introspect and dig real deep. And then it struck me – it was so simple! Two things consultants are very good at, are negotiations and compromises with the clients. This was no different. Exotic Girl was my client and I had to negotiate and get her to compromise. Did it work….hell yeah!!! After all I am a consultant…I am superman!!!

Epilogue: We agreed on a soft go-live, i.e. pilot launch, to be conducted on Facebook so that we seal the deal and create the terms of reference until I am able to travel to the Old World early next year for the more formal go-live!

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November 2, 2009 - Posted by | Life

1 Comment »

  1. Well done! I like the attitude! (if only you were a girl, this would definitely qualify as a “you go, girl” moment…!)

    Comment by res ipsa | November 5, 2009 | Reply


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